


Goodbye Sweetheart

by irish_gold



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Character Death, M/M, Mentions of Character Death, this is kind of sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-12
Updated: 2013-06-12
Packaged: 2017-12-14 17:30:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,038
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/839494
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/irish_gold/pseuds/irish_gold
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Small one-shot to make up for the time I spent away from writing. Feedback much appreciated. (All grammar and spelling mistakes are my own)</p><p>Night night guys! x</p>
    </blockquote>





	Goodbye Sweetheart

**Author's Note:**

> Small one-shot to make up for the time I spent away from writing. Feedback much appreciated. (All grammar and spelling mistakes are my own)
> 
> Night night guys! x

He didn’t know why he was back here, didn’t understand why after three years he came back to the one place he swore he would never come back too. He doesn’t question himself though he keeps walking with one hand shoved in the pocket of his trouser and the other holding a small bouquet of flowers all rearranged in a nice form.

It was chilly out, late October in London was one to dread, he treaded through the soft green grass that looked so un kept.  _You’d think they’d have a little more respect._  Harry thought to himself. He started looking around looking at the stone graves that were lined up perfectly in straight rows going across the cemetery.

Before the  _accident_  Harry used to love coming here, loved to make up stories for people who had passed away, sometimes he would just come here to put flowers on a random grave that no longer had flowers on it.

Finally after a while of walking through the small field he made it to his destination.

He stared at the grave looking at it with cold green eyes, Harry wanted to look away he wanted to walk away.

Why did he come here? Why is it that after three years he decided that it was time to come visit the small blond boy that still plagued his mind at random times of the day? He shook his head and set the bouquet down putting it to rest before the grave.

He willed himself to walk away, to turn around and leave. But he didn’t instead he sat down in front of the grave. He looked at the words engraved in the stone, watched it till the words no longer meant something.

‘Do you know how long I waited for you to get better? Do you know how long it took for the doctors to finally tell us the truth?’ Harry started his eyes already gleaming with tears that threatened to fall. He didn’t want to cry but he had known already that coming here would cause him tears and memories to flash before his eyes. He knew that coming here would break his heart.

‘A year! A year Niall! I waited a whole year just to hear some news that—that ended up killing you!’ Harry yelled his hands fisted by his sides.

‘I had begged them to tell me what was wrong with you, to tell my why you looked so pale and why you were tired all the time. I begged them Niall, to tell my why you were coughing out blood. But they didn’t tell me a thing! They lied to me! They kept telling me how it was normal, that coughing out blood was normal, and that deathly pale colour you wore on your skin was normal. They lied telling me that in a few months you would get better, but a month turned to two, two turned to six, six turned to twelve months. I waited a year to finally see your eyes.’ Harry said he tried to wipe away his tears as fast as he could with his fist.

‘But I guess I can’t be mad at them for lying to me they were only trying to keep me from the cold hearted truth. The only person I can truly blame is myself, right Ni?’ He asked the grave a small smile on his lips; he licked at them tasting salty tears that had run down his face.

He chuckled, ‘If you were still here you would have yelled at me for blaming myself but—but you’re not  _here!_ ’

‘You left me here all alone! You left me to face this cruel world all on my own. Do you know how much pain I have suffered since the day you died? They killed me Niall. They ripped me off my feelings; they killed all the happiness that was left in me. The whole world turned against me when you died! I was hurt so bad when you died Niall.’ Harry yelled at the gravestone his eyes were puffy from all he was crying.

‘I was left naked and bare to this world, they laughed at my pain, they killed me slowly inside so I could hurt some more! After a while it no longer mattered what these people did to me, I no longer cared for what pain people caused me. Do you wanna know why babe?’ Harry asked quietly.

He sniffed and said, ‘Because I am no longer alive inside. I’m dead Niall! They’ve left me bare of any emotions. What they do to me no longer hurts me because—because I am  _dead inside_!’

He pushed himself closer to the gravestone and started tracing the letters with his finger, his hands shook as he felt a gust of wind blow threw him. ‘I miss you though.’ He said quietly the tears still trailed down his face but he no longer cared for them, he smiled through the tears.

‘I miss waking up to you, I miss kissing you in the mornings even before we’ve brushed our teeth. I miss coming home to you singing in Spanish whilst cooking us dinner, I miss you trying to get a lick out of the batter whilst I baked. I—I miss you. I miss making  _love_  to you at night.’ His finger traced the letters that spelled out Niall’s name.

_N-I-A-L-L J-A-M-E-S H-O-R-A-N._

_‘_ You were so fragile after the accident I was so scared of hurting you. When I hugged you I would be gentle because I thought that if I held you tight you’d break into a million shards of glass. When I kissed you it was just a light peck on the lips because I was afraid I would crush you into pieces.’ Harry said barely able to recall the long nights he spent in the hospital with Niall, wrapping the blond Irishman in his arms.

‘Baby I miss you. I miss you so much.’ Harry took a deep breath—

And he said, ‘You were my angel, my light, my only love. And I will wait ‘til the time comes when I can finally wrap you in my arms again. Goodbye sweetheart.’


End file.
